Okay Prayer Team,
This is your blog. Scroll down, hit the comment command and write to me and to the rest of us. What’s new? Are you okay? Are you bearly holding up and how can we help?
thank you Sheri for adding the blog! Something interesting my youngest grand daughter age 2 while in our church before the service looked up in the balcony and pointed and said ‘there’s Josh, Hi Josh, Hi Josh, Hi Josh………..she has never met him but she has seen many pictures of him, he passed 4 years ago. I found this very interesting.
It’s fantastic the way the children can see spirit! I wish I was that open! Thanks for sharing this confirmation of the presence of spirit! I love it.
Thank you Sheri for this opportunity to share with other fellow parents that are unfortunately traveling in this path of life. I don’t know how other parents, including yourself have dealt with the almost unbearable pain of the first anniversary, but as this date is quickly approaching, (March 2nd), the intense physical pain has almost incapacitated me. I think all these months I was on some sort of adrenaline rush and in a state of Shock and denial, that now as the reality is settling in and making it self a permanent fixture in my heart and mind, my sorrow has sunken me into a quicksand of despair and disillusionment for everything that life has meant for me up to this point.
Yesterday, my eldest and now my only living son, had a long conversation about my son and his only brother Jeremy. Since we don’t know if his death was intentional or accidental. We believe it was accidental, because of the nature of my son, and the plans he had made for the weekend, which included a hunting trip with his grandpa. The police failed to even properly investigate the incident, and because of the manner of death with a weapon and his age (teen) it was concluded before it even was started and ruled a suicide. My son and I conversed about the circumstances of how we believed the accident occurred, and I shared with him how very disappointed I am with myself for not pursuing a further investigation. We conversed for about an hour and of course we sobbed because we miss him so much. My son got ready for work, and I continued my chores. I let our dogs out to take care of their business, (we have 2 large Golden Retrievers that were my son Jeremy’s dogs), and around 10 minutes later, I let them back in…well I looked out the door and Oh my goodness, I noticed a Huge HEART made out of, believe it or not… dog pee! Our family always shared a sometimes inappropriate sense of humor! I took several pictures of the beautiful dog pee heart! I truly believe it was a silly sign from my Jerebear, letting me know in our silly family way, how much he loves us, and perhaps a early Valentine heart for us!
I am glad you are using this space to express your feelings and I hope that others will add their responses as well. I believe that the signs can come in any way, shape or form, and when it has meaning for you, that’s the ticket. I am glad you will be having a reading soon because that will help you a great deal. But I also want to say that no matter what the investigation says, or how it defines Jerebear’s passing, what matters is what you feel in your heart. You will have more answers after your reading but don’t beat yourself up about the investigation. That was a horrendous, unreal, agonizing time in your life and you were and are overwhelmed with the loss. But I believe that your feelings about what actually happened will be confirmed in your reading and that will help you to not feel so bad about the investigation.
I know that that first Prayer Date seems to bring back all the pain of loss fresh and new. Keep in mind that Jeremy and all of you will be receiving the prayers of many and that the prayers carry an energy the heals, and so you will not go through this alone!
Thank you Sheri. I just got back from a Compassionate friends meeting and I shared my silly dog pee heart Photo! Everyone was in Awe and everyone certainly believed about it being a sign. I mentioned the prayer registry site and I also mentioned about connecting with our children…to my surprise, everyone started talking about their own personal connections. I left tonight’s meeting with peace in my aching heart and for once, I was the one comforting others that have just been selected to start this painful journey. My Jerebear was with me, I believe he gave me the strength tonight. Tomorrow may be another story.
Ida, I am just now reading your story and LOVE the sign that your Jeremy sent!! It wouldn’t mean anything to someone else, but makes sense for you…that is why it is so meaningful. When a sign is sent, the receiver will just know it…don’t let anyone tell you differently. Hugs to you!!
Valerie, Grant’s Mom
Last night I asked my son Jeremy to please stay by the side of a dear friend, that was getting ready to pass, I told him, this dear man took care and watched over you while you were at school, now you can greet him and take care of him when he passes. I asked Jeremy to give me a sign to let me know when Benjamin passed away ( He was the school custodian), everyone loved him dearly, he went in for minor back surgery and what they found was stage 4 cancer that had spread everywhere. He was diagnosed last week. When We went to see him, we told him that our Jeremy was waiting for him…he said he knew. Yesterday he was released from the hospital to go home and pass, they ambulance drove him to the all boys Catholic High school to say farewell. It was so very touching, he looked strong. This morning, as asked…a large 16 x 20″ picture of Jeremy, fell over about 8:30 a.m. Later today we learned that Benjamin had passed away at home in the morning. My son let us know, so I believe he did in fact greet him home! ^J^
Wow….just saw this Ida. That’s very cool and it does sound as if Jerebear was giving you the sign.
How do I begin…Today as I was checking online our phone usage and data plan usage…I noticed that Jeremy’s Phone, which by the way is still on and nothing has been changed, has been active in accessing the internet. I have paperless billing, so I hadn’t been aware of such activity. I checked the history and for several months…his phone was using his GB’s. I called our cell phone carrier to find out what was going on with Jere’s phone. What the customer rep said, left us both in AW! This is what he said…that for several months…he didn’t tell me how long exactly, but he said that at exactly 11:00 p.m., someone accesses Jere’s internet on his phone. He said this is so strange, because everyday not at 10:59 or 11:01, only at 11:00 p.m. it is being used. He also said something even stranger….that on the 2nd of the month this occurs 2 x’s, at 11:00 pm and 3:00 am! This is when I said OMG, he passed away on the 2nd of the month! We both were silent for a minute…then he said, perhaps your baby is trying to communicate!
Please kept in mind…we still have his phone service on, and all we do is charge it once a week. His ph was less than a month old, so he didn’t even have many of his friends or family numbers…and he did access the internet and the i-tunes to download music…but he never cleared his browser history so we were able to check what sites he had been on…it was all game downloads or ratings on which games were worth downloading.
So…what do you think?
One of those things that make me go hmmm…
The names of the children today, Christian, I have my Christian. Baby Jessee’s middle name, Malachi. My Jason’s middle name is Malachi! Coincidence? Hello? I don’t know, but it felt more like “hi mom!:”
It is interesting. Christine, did you get up the courage to set of a phone reading with one of the mediums? I really think you deserve to connect-up with those boys of yours!!!
Almost there. I’m trying so hard to do your meditation exercise but my mind just won’t shut up!
Trust me on this Chris, it never will! The purpose of meditation isn’t to stop the mind because that is virtually impossible, it is just to be able to see the mind and observe it. In all the years I’ve been into meditation I have never been able to stay with more than 3 in breaths and 3 out breaths before I’m gone, lost in some thought. When I first started meditation I became very frustrated and said, “I cannot do this!” because I mistakenly believed that people actually could get their minds to be silent. But after years of working with it and learning from many teachers, I came to understand that it is more about what is called “Cultivating the Witness” because through meditation you become the witness of your thoughts. You see, as soon as you realize that you are lost in thought and remember to go back to breath, you are purposely taking your focus away from the distracting thoughts and getting some space between yourself and the thoughts. For example, ordinarily people do not observe their thoughts, they just react to them as if they are so real. So you might think about something someone said, react by getting mad, and then you might call that person and tell them off. When meditating, when that same thought comes up, rather than reacting you’re observing and you think, “Oh, anger” and now you are not at the effect of the thought but the witness of it. After you’ve been witnessing your thoughts for a while many good things come about. 1. you see that you are not your thoughts, that you are the awareness that is having them. 2. you see the kind of thoughts that come up for you habitually. 3. Instead of reacting to your thoughts you have the space to observe and understand your own mind a little better.
Probably the most powerful thing that happens in the beginning is that you really see that you are the awareness in which all these thoughts take place and that you can learn to direct that flashlight beam of awareness in any direction that you want. So many people are run by their minds without seeing this at all. They think something, then they react to it and before you know it they are tangled up in a situation. So meditation is not about making the mind silent, you couldn’t do it anyway, but about stepping back from the mind and seeing the mind and observing it and seeing that you can gain some control over it rather than it having all the control over you!
There is so much to learn and uncover through meditation but first of all get any notions out of your head about what to expect. Most of the time I’m breathing and visualizing only to find that my mind has taken me off into something else. Once I see this I say to my mind, “Thank you for sharing, I know you always have a lot to say, but for two God Damn seconds I’m going to breathe.”
But don’t make yourself crazy. Take your 10 minutes a day and then walk away. In time you will find that you are experiencing life a little more fully. For example. I will often remind myself to focus on my breathing while I’m doing things, like eating, or having my back rubbed of when my hair is washed by the lady at the beauty parlor and I swear, my sensation of feeling and tasting is so heightened. I think we are so lost in our minds so much of the time that we are hardly present for what is happening in the moment points of our lives. So, meditation helps in many ways, but as I said, I’ve been practicing it for decades and my mind is far from quiet! One of my favorite teachers of meditation is an american woman ordained as a buddhist monk, her name is Pema Chodrun. She is a wonderful teacher and she always jokes about this very thing and claims to have a very noisy mind, so you are in good company!
Just keep working with it because it will develop and grow and you won’t even necessarily see it happening!
Thank you so very much for this additional info. It resonates deeply for me & will definitely help me while I meditate. You’re so awesome Sheri. Love you!
Whew! Okay, now that I can “think” about it a different way, I will be persistent.
It’s serendipitous that you use anger as an example because I think that is my biggest block all these years later.
Once again Sheri, thank you! Thanks for the clarity, the love, and time you give to each and every one of us.
xo back to you
I love your email today Sheri. As always words of strength and wisdom hit my heart.
So many “members”, it’s overwhelming. I’d like to add to anyone who cares to read this, if you don’t already leave a thought that can be read, please think about it. I will continue to say your child/children’s names out loud and leave you and them a positive thought. I know it helps me and also that our children hear the love sent to them. None of us want them forgotten and this is a beautiful way to ensure that. To all of you who do leave your words, thank you from my soul.
Peace and love to all.
October 20, 2014
Sometimes this sick feeling hits me fast and is very negative. Even after 7 years I am still angry and just wish that feeling would go away. It consumes my mind, body, and soul. I go to work but I am really not here. Just wanting to go to sleep and hope I don’t have negative dreams. I don’t scream out because I know it won’t change anything. Life goes on…and on… Even after a medium session I am lifted briefly but then just want more. When months have gone by and I have seen or felt any signs of Charles I wonder if he is gone forever. But then all of a sudden the lamp switches on. Yes it is a touch lamp but no one is in the room. Being a scientist I probably could figure out how it came on. But in my heart I know it is Charles. He is waiting for me. I know he has work to do on the other side. Love always my sweet and only Son. Mom
I am sure that every one of us understands what you are talking about. We will always wish they were here, until we make the crossing too, which of course we will do. You said that going to a medium lifts you, but then you want more, but isn’t that natural for love? If Charles were living in a foreign country, you would make long distance calls to him and after a few days would pass, you would want to call him again. The reason you are lifted by readings with mediums is because they give you confidence that the relationship continues despite the veil that exists between our worlds. That is why I tell bereaved parents to have readings more often, for they give you some tangible relief. After a while, your confidence in the presence of spirit grows, allowing you to sense him more often. We can all come up with scientific explanations for all the strange phenomenon that takes place, but like you said, you know in your heart that it’s Charles. It’s that kind of knowing that gets stronger with each experience of connecting-up, whether it be through dreams, thoughts, signs, or readings with mediums. One of the things that I do is to continue to educate myself through reading and exploring spirituality. There’s a book by Bill Guggenheim called “Hello From Heaven” in which he shares countless case histories submitted to him by ordinary people like me and you, who have had ADC’s (After Death Communications). It makes you realize that we just aren’t seeing the whole picture and it’s only through an understanding of where we came from and where we are going that we can have any peace about loss.
I wouldn’t fight the feelings of sorrow, for resisting them is another form of suffering. I think that it’s more helpful to respond to them by doing something to bring you close to Charles through the spiritual channels that are within you. Take ten minutes a day to devote to sending out your love to Charles and breathing in his. Allow yourself a few readings (only with sincere, competent mediums) a year, keep a steady flow of books around, take a course or a workshop every once in a while and just keep educating yourself about spirit. The more you grow in confidence about the afterlife, the less unhappy you will feel. Well, it helps me a lot and I can only speak about what has helped me. I have lost Danny in the flesh, but I have found him in the spirit and until I cross over, that’s at least something!
Thinking of all of us today and I have to say I am so thankful for you, Sheri, for giving this forum of unconditional support and love. I am also thankful for those few constant voices who take the time to post remembrances and and words of comfort for the hundreds of children and their families. I hope you all have moments and peace through your love for each other and the unbroken connection of your children.
Chris, forever Jason and Christian’s mom
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